A Second Look

March 22, 2024

By Nicole


Have you ever watched a movie you’ve seen before, but this time, new information stands out? This happens to me all the time, and do you know why? It’s not like the movie is any different. It wasn’t added to or altered in any way. The director didn’t take it out of rotation and shoot some extra footage and stuff them in between familiar scenes. No. It’s not that the movie itself has changed. 

It’s that we have.

In life, we should be growing.

I know there are people out there who think it’s a bad thing if you change, but I think it’s a bad thing if you don’t. When I read my old writings, whether blog posts or books, I have to prepare myself. 20-something or 30-something Nicole is going to be at a different life juncture. More than likely, I won’t think the same things I did back then, hold the same views, or feel the same ways.

Hopefully, you don’t either.

I can reflect and see some pivotal moments of my journey, usually caused by hardship and loss, that altered my perceptions and how I functioned thereafter. Those tough times really reveal what you’re made of—or what you’re not. But more than likely, you’re made of something because you read this blog, and I naturally attract people who are about something.

I naturally attract overcomers. Share on X

But like I said, you aren’t just inducted into this overcoming camp. No. You got hazed into it. And guess what happened after the hazing? You changed.

It’s this experience of change that causes you to see things differently. That’s why that movie you’ve watched over and over appears different. I swear I’ve watched The Five Heartbeats too many times to count (it’s a childhood favorite), yet I get something new out of it every time. I’m certain, though, they edited out a scene that shows Duck’s fiancé in a relationship with his brother JT b/c that scene where he finds out his brother and fiancé were at one point together, isn’t as solid as it needs to be. Anyways. I digress…

Am I the only one who thinks God has a sense of humor? I think He knows that we are on a track of growing and evolving, and as a result, He might stick something smack dab in the middle of our faces. But maybe because our view was a little less mature, a little less clear, back then we didn’t see it. But once we mature and have a more enhanced view of life, ourselves, and purpose, well, that view becomes sharper. That object suddenly shapes into focus. We look again, and the thing we thought we were missing was there the whole time. 

This happened to me recently. I can honestly say that a huge burden was lifted once I looked again at what God was pointing to that I didn’t see before. It was like years of loneliness and rejection vanished, and my understanding was enlightened. All those times I felt alone, I never really was. 

But to get that revelation, I had to look again.

What is it in your life that you need to take another look at?

Maybe at first glance, it appeared it wasn’t what you thought it was. It wasn’t a good fit. It didn’t pay enough. It wasn’t smart enough. But then you realize, hey, this is actually exactly what I need!

I’m the kind where I tend to be on the move. I’m in a go-go-go season and hardly ever look back. I’m kind of like that anyway, though, even outside of this hustle season. I like to “keep it moving,” as an elder told me recently.

But moving too fast in life is the equivalent of half-watching a movie. Share on X

(I know, what’s up with these movie references? Stick with me; I promise I’m on to something) Sure, you can say you watched the movie, but you missed some really key moments and weren’t fully present if you were only half watching. Did you catch that side-joke that one character made to the other? Did you peep the wardrobe change that alluded to who the bad guy was (just in case you didn’t know, the bad guy is usually dressed in black)?

But that’s the benefit of having time on our side. As much as I’ve hated the characteristic of time that causes the excessive painstaking experience of waiting, the positive side is that it gives us time to re-examine the parts of life we may have missed. That could mean offering an apology to someone you offended. Calling a loved one back to say “I love you” if you rushed off the phone after a heated argument. Buying that new Coach purse for your birthday you didn’t get last year. Oh wait, was that last one just for me?

When we wait, time is on our side—even when it seems like it takes forever to get to the destination. But if we miss a turn or two, it gives us time to get back on track, look again, and take the right course of action.

And, for those of you who have no idea what the heck The Five Heartbeats is, shame on you and click here. You’re welcome.

In other news…Did you know that I just dropped my debut novel When Love Wins? You can check out more here! This time around there is an audiobook in addition to the eBook and paperback versions. Make sure you are subscribed to my email list to catch special offers, discounts, insider information, and more!

Are you on Instagram/Facebook? If so, please reach out. I have a series called “Word of the Day Wednesdays” where I share 5-10 minutes worth of nuggets that are on my heart, which I hope are encouraging to others on IGTV/FB Live! I have these also posted on my Youtube Channel.

And, lastly, if you have read “Stories for the (Urban) Soul, please put up an Amazon review here. I was SUPER encouraged and blessed when a new reader put up her review for my 2nd book which you can view here :).

As always, thank you for your support!


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