I’ve been binging on Love is Blind lately. Have you seen it? Initially, the concept might seem a little loony. Two people dating multiple strangers while engaging in a series of questions and answers through a wall dividing them into two rooms? Finally, they narrow down their options until ultimately proposing to someone they’ve never seen after just four weeks of talking. It gives desperate, weird vibes, for sure. But, if we look at history and other countries’ traditions of finding love, is it that far-fetched? 

Take Abraham in the Bible, for example. After his wife, Sarah dies, Abraham says it’s time to find his son, Isaac, a wife. But instead of the country of Canaan they reside in, he’s like, “No. We need to get you someone from my hometown, Ur.” So, he sends his servant Eliezer to carry out the task. From my understanding, Abraham did this because the women in his country were a little racy. We would probably call them “thots,” and you know a good Hebrew man is not about to be wifin’ no thot.

To ensure his son marries an upright woman with good character, Abraham has to take it back to his native hometown, Ur. Eliezer kind of pushes back and suggests that he may not be able to find a woman willing to travel all that way just to get hitched. But Abraham is adamant that his son is marrying someone from that land. Eliezer even tosses out that, Maybe Isaac should move to Ur if the woman doesn’t want to travel all that way for her new boo? But Abraham fiercely holds on to the promise. God told him Isaac would birth his descendants in Canaan. Canaan is where the promise is. Isaac must stay in Canaan.

Have you ever had something in your heart that you know is for sure for sure a part of your purpose? Your calling? Your destiny? But then maybe others are kind of pushing back on that, and it causes you to question?

Did I really hear what I thought I heard? Was I really supposed to leave that man? That job? That city?

I know it can get difficult when we’re stumbling through life and flailing along trying to figure out our next moves. Purpose is a winding road of voluminous twists and turns that often seemingly dip over a cliff only to sharply incline back up a rocky mountain. But what if eternity is truly written in your heart? Then that means that what is promised bypasses anything within your natural sight.

Ok, getting back to Love is Blind. I’m watching it now with new eyes and I’m thinking, is it really so crazy to get engaged to someone after just four weeks? Back in the day, Rebekah hadn’t even met Isaac and had no clue what her man looked like before she agreed to go with Eliezer to meet him. Too many folks these days jump the gun when they spot a cutie with crisp waves or a female with crazy curves. They let their eyes lead, and then their minds follow instead of vice versa. I’ve been in too many of those situations myself. And guess what? They don’t last. 

I guess the question, “Is love blind?” is really asking, can you love someone without ever seeing or meeting them face-to-face? Can you commit to doing life with them forever?

Years ago, I asked my pastor how she and her husband had stayed married for so long. They’ve been married longer than I’ve been alive, yet she was only 18 when they tied the knot. Her response to my question will always stay with me. 

“We understood covenant.” 

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, a covenant is a binding agreement. This is definitely something we’ve gotten away from in our culture. We understand business and legal contracts very well, but do we understand a lifelong commitment to someone no matter what?

Now, I know there are plenty of toxic, abusive, horrific marriages out there, so I’m not saying we need to be enduring that kind of mess. No. I’m talking about the ones where hard things happen, but we persevere together. Where are those? 

Could it be we’re more consumed with looks than a person’s substance? Could it be that our eyes have led us straight into the dark caverns of broken hearts?

There’s one particular pair I have my eye on on the show. They are definitely winning in the looks department, have swag, chemistry, can dress their butts off, and are both super successful. Can you say hashtag, “Black love”? Still, I’m on the edge of my seat every episode, wondering if they have what it takes. Beneath the fluff and fun, do they have the character, maturity, and tenacity to endure? 

Do they have true love?

Love suffers long. 

I know what suffering long is all about but I’m still not an expert on love. I haven’t been in love in nearly 20 years. I have vague memories of that euphoric feeling. That intoxicating high that had me googly-eyeing my man and flying high off an insatiable daily desire to be with him. But that love ended, and as told in my first book, proved to be misguided. Maybe it was the foundation of seeing him before we committed and being swept off my feet by the exterior? Maybe this next time, it will be better if I let the eyes of my heart lead instead of the eyes on my face.

What do you think?

Is love blind?

Share your comments below…

In other news…Did you know that I just dropped my debut novel When Love Wins? You can check out more here! This time around there is an audiobook in addition to the eBook and paperback versions. Make sure you are subscribed to my email list to catch special offers, discounts, insider information, and more!

Are you on Instagram/Facebook? If so, please reach out. I have a series called “Word of the Day Wednesdays” where I share 5-10 minutes worth of nuggets that are on my heart, which I hope are encouraging to others on IGTV/FB Live! I have these also posted on my Youtube Channel.

And, lastly, if you have read “Stories for the (Urban) Soul, please put up an Amazon review here. I was SUPER encouraged and blessed when a new reader put up her review for my 2nd book which you can view here :).

As always, thank you for your support!

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