Do You Need Help to Believe?

November 12, 2023

By Nicole


I’ve had the luxury of doing life with amazing women for 20+ years. For over two decades, these stellar, driven, successful, beautiful, intelligent women have honored me by curating memories, encouraging conversations, and holding pain. We have weathered storms, hurricanes, and tornadoes. We’ve also celebrated the milestones and accomplishments that life brings when walking a path of purpose. We are, dare I say, blessed?

I realize this is not the experience of all. Women have been bruised and scarred by people they called friends, probably since the first female-friendship pair ever existed. I know, even from my own mother’s journey with friendships, that a woman can grow up to live her whole adulthood and never know what having a true non-blood-related sister feels like. That was one of my mother’s motivations for praying so fervently that I would know this experience. It was because she didn’t have it herself.

What she couldn’t believe for herself, she believed for me.

There are times we are able to believe for others more easily. Can you relate?

There’s a goal, a dream, a desire you see your loved one has, and you yourself have, but you have more faith to know that they will obtain it.

Maybe it’s a job, a promotion, or a baby? Maybe it’s their lifelong dream trip or that book they’ve been wanting to publish? Side note: go ahead and capitalize on this National Novel Writing Month if this is you!

But when it comes to you, well, that’s a different story. You’ve been waiting for how long? You’ve been trying how hard? It seems it will never happen.

Years ago, I read a woman’s blog about her waiting experience. She was walking out a long season of singleness and desired her spouse. She had weathered many storms and endured many trials. She had seen the Father move in so many areas of her life. She had witnessed her sister’s marriage and subsequent child being born, but she was still alone.

One day at church, she went to the altar for prayer. She told the woman standing there her need. She told the woman she was tapped out. She had given up. There was nothing left for her to believe anymore. I’ll never forget the response of this woman. 

She looked at her and said, “Then I will believe for you.”

This was such a beautiful demonstration of community. We are not made to have the fullness of strength and faith and grit in and of ourselves. I’ll admit, the independent spirit in me bristles at this truth. There is something in me that wants to do it all on my own. But the fact is, our Creator did not make us to do it that way. To do life that way. We have an innate need to need Him. 

We have an innate need to need each other.

Have your circumstances become too heavy for you to carry the load all on your own? Are your spiritual eyes blinded by the pain and disappointment of life? Are your feet worn from the treacherous long-winding road of your wait? 

Then ask someone to believe for you.

I have been experiencing this phenomenon lately without even asking. When I struggle with doubt and question what I feel God has put in my heart, someone who knows my situation suddenly pops up with a word of encouragement. It is confirmation. They are believing for me.

One evening, I was speaking to my dear friend who has been a mother to me in this season of not having my mother physically. I shared with her my heart and poured out my thoughts. I was surprised at how receptive she was. 

“How can you believe?” I asked, “When this has never been done?” She was so simple in her response.

“There was a time when you had never written a book, and then you wrote it.”

It’s true. There was a time before we had ever done something when that thing had never been done. Just because it’s never been done doesn’t mean it can’t be. Doesn’t mean it won’t be. It just hasn’t happened yet.

Are you someone in need of a friend or community to believe for you? Simply email me and share your need, and I will believe. 

And just in case you were wondering that young blogger I shared about earlier, has been married five years and now has two children.


In other news…Did you know that I just dropped my debut novel When Love Wins? You can check out more here! This time around there is an audiobook in addition to the eBook and paperback versions. Make sure you are subscribed to my email list to catch special offers, discounts, insider information, and more!

Are you on Instagram/Facebook? If so, please reach out. I have a series called “Word of the Day Wednesdays” where I share 5-10 minutes worth of nuggets that are on my heart, which I hope are encouraging to others on IGTV/FB Live! I have these also posted on my Youtube Channel.

And, lastly, if you have read “Stories for the (Urban) Soul, please put up an Amazon review here. I was SUPER encouraged and blessed when a new reader put up her review for my 2nd book which you can view here :).

As always, thank you for your support!

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